I’m only human after all.

So…

 

Not sure if I already stated that I work as an Admin. Assistant at the northern branch of *bleep* company, but yeah, I work as an admin. And boooooy, I have mixed feelings on that.

 

The good:

 

Working as an admin for a strict looking but chill boss is not that bad. My boss seems like that kind of a person that doesn’t care what you do so long as you do your job and finish on time. I also get free lunches when he sends me out on an errand or when vendors come in for a lunch and learn. Plus, it’s pretty chill and I LOVE doing paper works. I figured I should start out in this position and climb my way up the human resources ladder. As a Business student grad with emphasis on Human Resources and Accounting, I would like to be working in the HR department.

 

The bad:

 

Well, there’s not really that much con on my…. Oooh!! Time cards!

 

Every Friday, I need to enter hours of employees on the accounting software that we use. And therefore, I collect their time cards before I enter their hours. I specifically hate one person in the office because of this. Not only is he late turning in his time cards, but most of the time, HE DOESN’T EVEN TURN IT IN, it’s freaking annoying! Gaaah, just thinking about it pisses me off.

 

But eh, I shouldn’t digress from the topic.

 

As an admin. Assistant, I am in charge of planning, preparing and making sure that everything goes well in an event. Fun, right? I’m not really good at that, especially since I don’t like doing it at home either. Not that I don’t like having friends over, but I don’t like all the preparing part. Oh wait, sometimes I do… but it all depends on my mood! Anyway, so right now, I’m in charge of coordinating the details for our upcoming company’s Holiday Party. Since our company has different branches all over the state, our CEO wants to have a ONE PARTY for everyone. Long story short, the company is hosting a huge event down south and they’re flying all their employees who wants to come along with their spouse/guests WITH ALL EXPENSES PAID.

 

EVERYTHING. WILL. BE. TAKEN. CARE. OF.

 

You literally just have to show up with your spouse/guest and enjoy.

 

But of course, to make all of that work, so many things need to get done, right? That’s where my dilemma lies in. You see, the company said that for those people who will be flying out of *bleep* airport, they don’t have to worry about booking their flights because WE WILL TAKE CARE OF IT ON OUR END. However, if they will be flying out of a different airport, THEN THEY WILL BE ON THEIR OWN. But of course, if they choose to book their own tickets, the company will REIMBURSE THEIR FLIGHT TICKETS up to a certain amount. Sounds good to be true? Yeah, I know. I was surprised at first, actually.

 

So, what just happened? Well, there was a couple that initially wanted to fly out of a different airport but then something happened, and they requested to just fly out of the specified airport, so we need to get their flights booked. This is where it started going bad.

 

I WASN’T ABLE TO MOVE THEIR NAMES FROM THEIR AIRPORT LIST TO THE NEW AND UPDATED LIST OF PEOPLE FLYING OUT OF *BLEEP* AIRPORT.

 

And the thing is, all flights have already been booked and the person in charge of the booking told me that we cannot add any more passengers to the flight. Which means…. The couple doesn’t have any flights booked for them for the party.

 

Ayana dang it.

 

Now I know what you’re going to say. I know, I know. It’s totally my fault and I’m owning up to it. I’m not gonna lie. From you I cannot hide… what? Where did that lyrics came from? (yeah, terrible idea to slip in a joke, huh?)

 

I’m just trying to make light of things.

 

You see, when I mess something up and it affects another person, I feel like a huge disappointment for letting them down. I hate that feeling of disappointing someone and therefore, I beat myself up when I do. Yes, I am critical of myself. Does that make me a perfectionist? No, no. I don’t strive to be perfect in anything I do, per se. I just… don’t want to disappoint anyone, you know? And I know that that’s not how it works. We will disappoint people around us, be they friends, family or a stranger. Heck, we can even disappoint ourselves. And I know, that’s normal because PEOPLE HAVE FLAWS. It’s what makes us humans after all. We have to accept the fact that we make mistakes and do terrible shits or horrible decisions and well… that’s okay, as long as we use it as a learning experience and better ourselves. We don’t need to beat ourselves up because of that mistake. We have to be compassionate to ourselves.

 

I don’t like making mistakes because I’m worried that people might think that I’m stupid or I should know better or worst, I might disappoint someone. But I’m trying to overcome that mentality. I’m trying to embrace my mistakes and learn from them so I can do better next time.

 

So, to end this entry… I will do my best to rectify…–

 

AYANA DANG IT!

 

The employee’s wife just called me and said that she’ll book their own flights and just reimburse! Problem solved! Phew, and here I got worked up for nothing!

 

Moral of the story: DO NOT MAKE MISTAKES.

 

Lol. No, no. Mistakes happen and no need to beat yourself up for it. Stand up, own up for your mistake and fix the crap out of it and enjoy life! 😊

 

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